is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
