Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
