Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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