Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
