ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Randomize
