It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Randomize