wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Randomize
