he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
