Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Randomize
