how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Randomize
