So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
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