My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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