Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
