do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Randomize
