Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Randomize
