he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I have tasted many bathrooms
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Randomize
