I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
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