He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
