went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Randomize
