i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
