I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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