You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
