Already got asked if we're dating
You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Randomize
