you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Randomize
