alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
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