question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Crop dusting thru forever 21
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
