Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize