It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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