Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
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