my room smells like sperm. sweet.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
