Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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