I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Randomize
