HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
