chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
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