So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
