Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I have fence marks all over my body
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
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