Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
50% drunk capacity currently
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
