Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Randomize
