Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
