The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
