If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
