im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
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