i don't like sucking hair
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
