sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
