that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
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