Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Randomize
