I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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