I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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