he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
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