Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Randomize
